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Exploring Different Types of Parenting
Styles
When you bring a newborn home for the first time, it can be
pretty scary. You feel like now that you're a parent, you're
supposed to have all the answers and know exactly how to raise
your child. Often what you know about parenting good or bad
comes from the way your mother and father raised you.
Child psychologists have done extensive research in the area of
parenting styles. They've found the methods can be broken down
into three main categories: authoritarian, permissive, and
authoritative (also known as balanced or democratic). No one
style is correct, and many parents will use techniques from all
three parenting styles.
Authoritarian
Parents who are authoritarian believe in structure. While not
being abusive, they set high standards of behavior for their
children and require obedience. Adherents to this parenting
style get little input from their children when making
decisions. This style may be good for children with behavioral
or conduct disorders because they need structure and authority.
However, if this is not the case, the child of authoritarian
parents will often have low self-esteem and rely more often on
the voice of authority.
Permissive
While not being neglectful or careless, permissive parents let
their children make many decisions. They use this parenting
style to encourage creativity and spontaneity in their
children. These parents use reasoning rather than authority
when setting limits. This is a good parenting style for
withdrawn children, but not for rebellious or aggressive
children. This method can sometimes result in immature behavior
and an inability to control impulses.
Authoritative
The authoritative style of parenting is often seen as the best.
These parents are not particularly firm or permissive. They
also will set high standards for their children but leave some
of the decision-making up to each child. These parents reason
with and listen to their children but don't hesitate to insist
on certain behaviors and limits. This parenting style works
well with middle-of-the-road children who are neither shy nor
aggressive. It helps children develop a sense of independence
and self-sufficiency.
It is important to know that parents don't often use one
parenting style exclusively. But they do tend to lean toward
one philosophy more. The style that is used to bring up a child
must take the child's personality into account. What may work
for one child might not be successful for another child with a
different personality.
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